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Poems

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 12:59
by Woo Elephant Yeah
Have you got any poems, and would like to share them with other 5punkers?
Here's a relatively shit one I made a few months ago after having some chav riding up the ass of my car on his moped!


This is the tale of a chav called Darren,
and his pregnant teen girlfriend called Sharron.
He knocked her up nearly 9 months ago,
in the back of a Nova with an exhaust that would blow.

Condoms were something that "only fags use",
he was more interested in Sharron saving him two's.
His dick now hurts, and sometimes it will itch,
but all he cared about, was shagging "dat bitch".

Well Sharron is happy, as now she is "pregger's",
joined the ongoing list of professional white beggars.
With free housing given to those that don't care,
a stupid chav fucker, and a silly young mare!

Now that they have their inncoent young child,
it's time to corrupt them, and make them wild.
Let them grow up with no discipline or fear,
watching their old man getting wasted on cheap beer.

Darren moves to and fro' from bitch to bitch,
he's not the sort of guy that get's the hitch!
He's a father of 6 kids, with 6 different mothers,
not one single mum can he even call a lover.

In his eyes his behaviour is just plain normal,
smoke weed, nick cars, and watching the football.
Work you say? That doesn't exist,
for Darren that's staying home getting pis*ed.

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 13:07
by Dr. kitteny berk
that amused, have a cookie,

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 13:58
by Dog Pants
Not mine, but I like it (and put it as the only entry in my Eve bio):

I have a very spiffing hat,
It's metal with a handle.
But someone put some stew in it!
It must have been a vandal.

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 14:09
by mrbobbins
Very amusing!

I composed a Haiku especially:

Woo Elephant Yeah
likes poems about chavs life
maybe he is one!

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 15:32
by Woo Elephant Yeah
Bobbins oh Bobbins,
he likes barrels and baths,
team Robo ErrROAR

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 15:55
by Nickface
There once was a fellow named Berk
Who all the noobs though was a jerk
They thought the server was lax
So they all cried out "Hax!"
And he banned them all with a smirk


Or something :P

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 15:59
by Lateralus
Dr Kitteny
Owns the server Bukkake
Bukkakes down Berk

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:12
by mrbobbins
:lol: :above: :lol: :above: :lol: :above:

Ninja Pirates rule
Salmon Ninja Gayers dont
Watch out you broke board!

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:21
by Bob47
Hear is a crap one which i just made up

There once was a player called Bob
Everyone thought what a nob
He came on the tuesday
Got owned on the Wednesday
He pissed of Berk
And felt like a Jerk
That was the player called Bob
Who was a Nob

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:29
by Lateralus
Cheer up there young Bob
Just give back the shit you get
Then wurd deject's mum

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:33
by Bob47
i know but i just wanted to point out that i deserved it all

and it was all i could think off which rhymed

(soz for the spelling)

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:38
by Lateralus
Bob47 wrote:i know but i just wanted to point out that i deserved it all
Image

Just move on and start giving someone a bit of well-meant shit. For a start, you always seem to appear on the opposite team to me in Beef, and then kill me several times. Not once have you turned around and said:
What Bob47 should have wrote:HAHAHA - In your FACE Lat! I pwned you from 3 miles away with a pistol! How does it feel to be my pistol-bitch, bitch?

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:40
by Bob47
that is because it is mean i mean i could say that to all beef punkers once in a while but than i could see big men coming round my house and my legs walking off with them

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:46
by Lateralus
Bob, internet arguments aren't real.
The people you meet and talk to aren't real.
We aren't real - take Prof for example - an escaped CS:S bot with difficulty set to medium, radio chatter set to high and flash-bangs set to zero
Or Gunslinger - an escaped generic bot for all FPS games - with difficulty on max and radio-chatter set to minimal
Or Berk - a cupcake :lol:

Also, when a 15 year old kid says something along the lines of "OMG YOU HAXXOR! Img oing 2 find u and kill u cos i no wear u live u n00b. Innit" they won't actually do it.

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:48
by Bob47
it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:54
by mrbobbins
Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started
Dude liek chill out :faint:

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 16:56
by Lateralus
mrbobbins wrote:
Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started
Dude like chill out :faint:
You had a typo
I fixed it for you Bobbins
No need to thank me.

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 17:01
by mrbobbins
Lateralus wrote:
mrbobbins wrote:
Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started
Dude like chill out :faint:
You had a typo
I fixed it for you Bobbins
No need to thank me.
:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x
HOW DARE YOU CORRECT MY SPELLING!!!
:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x
I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!!!
:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 17:04
by Dr. kitteny berk
mrbobbins wrote:
Lateralus wrote:
mrbobbins wrote:
Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started
Dude like chill out :faint:
You had a typo
I fixed it for you Bobbins
No need to thank me.
:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x
HW DRE U CRCT MY SPELIN!!!
:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x
IM GOIN 2 KIL U!!!
:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x

Posted: March 21st, 2006, 17:05
by Lateralus
mrbobbins wrote:
Lateralus wrote:
mrbobbins wrote:
Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started
Dude like chill out :faint:
You had a typo
I fixed it for you Bobbins
No need to thank me.
:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x
How dare you correct my spelling?
:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x
I'm going to kill you!
:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x
Just plain shoddy grammer and punctuation that time.