Poems

Woo Elephant Yeah · Post by **Woo Elephant Yeah** » March 21st, 2006, 12:59

Have you got any poems, and would like to share them with other 5punkers?
Here's a relatively shit one I made a few months ago after having some chav riding up the ass of my car on his moped!

This is the tale of a chav called Darren,
and his pregnant teen girlfriend called Sharron.
He knocked her up nearly 9 months ago,
in the back of a Nova with an exhaust that would blow.

Condoms were something that "only fags use",
he was more interested in Sharron saving him two's.
His dick now hurts, and sometimes it will itch,
but all he cared about, was shagging "dat bitch".

Well Sharron is happy, as now she is "pregger's",
joined the ongoing list of professional white beggars.
With free housing given to those that don't care,
a stupid chav fucker, and a silly young mare!

Now that they have their inncoent young child,
it's time to corrupt them, and make them wild.
Let them grow up with no discipline or fear,
watching their old man getting wasted on cheap beer.

Darren moves to and fro' from bitch to bitch,
he's not the sort of guy that get's the hitch!
He's a father of 6 kids, with 6 different mothers,
not one single mum can he even call a lover.

In his eyes his behaviour is just plain normal,
smoke weed, nick cars, and watching the football.
Work you say? That doesn't exist,
for Darren that's staying home getting pis*ed.

Post by **Dr. kitteny berk** » March 21st, 2006, 13:07

that amused, have a cookie,

Post by **Dog Pants** » March 21st, 2006, 13:58

Not mine, but I like it (and put it as the only entry in my Eve bio):

I have a very spiffing hat,
It's metal with a handle.
But someone put some stew in it!
It must have been a vandal.

mrbobbins · Post by **mrbobbins** » March 21st, 2006, 14:09

Very amusing!

I composed a Haiku especially:

Woo Elephant Yeah
likes poems about chavs life
maybe he is one!

Woo Elephant Yeah · Post by **Woo Elephant Yeah** » March 21st, 2006, 15:32

Bobbins oh Bobbins,
he likes barrels and baths,
team Robo ErrROAR

Nickface · Post by **Nickface** » March 21st, 2006, 15:55

There once was a fellow named Berk
Who all the noobs though was a jerk
They thought the server was lax
So they all cried out "Hax!"
And he banned them all with a smirk

Or something

Lateralus · Post by **Lateralus** » March 21st, 2006, 15:59

Dr Kitteny
Owns the server Bukkake
Bukkakes down Berk

mrbobbins · Post by **mrbobbins** » March 21st, 2006, 16:12

Ninja Pirates rule
Salmon Ninja Gayers dont
Watch out you broke board!

Bob47 · Post by **Bob47** » March 21st, 2006, 16:21

Hear is a crap one which i just made up

There once was a player called Bob
Everyone thought what a nob
He came on the tuesday
Got owned on the Wednesday
He pissed of Berk
And felt like a Jerk
That was the player called Bob
Who was a Nob

Lateralus · Post by **Lateralus** » March 21st, 2006, 16:29

Cheer up there young Bob
Just give back the shit you get
Then wurd deject's mum

Bob47 · Post by **Bob47** » March 21st, 2006, 16:33

i know but i just wanted to point out that i deserved it all

and it was all i could think off which rhymed

(soz for the spelling)

Lateralus · Post by **Lateralus** » March 21st, 2006, 16:38

Bob47 wrote:i know but i just wanted to point out that i deserved it all

Just move on and start giving someone a bit of well-meant shit. For a start, you always seem to appear on the opposite team to me in Beef, and then kill me several times. Not once have you turned around and said:

What Bob47 should have wrote:HAHAHA - In your FACE Lat! I pwned you from 3 miles away with a pistol! How does it feel to be my pistol-bitch, bitch?

Bob47 · Post by **Bob47** » March 21st, 2006, 16:40

that is because it is mean i mean i could say that to all beef punkers once in a while but than i could see big men coming round my house and my legs walking off with them

Lateralus · Post by **Lateralus** » March 21st, 2006, 16:46

Bob, internet arguments aren't real.
The people you meet and talk to aren't real.
We aren't real - take Prof for example - an escaped CS:S bot with difficulty set to medium, radio chatter set to high and flash-bangs set to zero
Or Gunslinger - an escaped generic bot for all FPS games - with difficulty on max and radio-chatter set to minimal
Or Berk - a cupcake

Also, when a 15 year old kid says something along the lines of "OMG YOU HAXXOR! Img oing 2 find u and kill u cos i no wear u live u n00b. Innit" they won't actually do it.

Bob47 · Post by **Bob47** » March 21st, 2006, 16:48

it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started

mrbobbins · Post by **mrbobbins** » March 21st, 2006, 16:54

Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started

Dude liek chill out

Lateralus · Post by **Lateralus** » March 21st, 2006, 16:56

mrbobbins wrote:
Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started
Dude like chill out

You had a typo
I fixed it for you Bobbins
No need to thank me.

mrbobbins · Post by **mrbobbins** » March 21st, 2006, 17:01

Lateralus wrote:
mrbobbins wrote:
Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started
Dude like chill out
You had a typo
I fixed it for you Bobbins
No need to thank me.

HOW DARE YOU CORRECT MY SPELLING!!!

I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!!!

Post by **Dr. kitteny berk** » March 21st, 2006, 17:04

mrbobbins wrote:
Lateralus wrote:
mrbobbins wrote:
Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started
Dude like chill out
You had a typo
I fixed it for you Bobbins
No need to thank me.

HW DRE U CRCT MY SPELIN!!!

IM GOIN 2 KIL U!!!

Lateralus · Post by **Lateralus** » March 21st, 2006, 17:05

mrbobbins wrote:
Lateralus wrote:
mrbobbins wrote:
Bob47 wrote:it was a joke

GHEEZZ

god im sorry i ever started
Dude like chill out
You had a typo
I fixed it for you Bobbins
No need to thank me.

How dare you correct my spelling?

I'm going to kill you!

Just plain shoddy grammer and punctuation that time.