Blood Bowl - Keys Bowl 5punk League
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FatherJack
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buzzmong
- Weighted Storage Cube
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- Joined: February 26th, 2007, 17:26
- Location: Middle England, nearish Cov
Dubstep Demons Vs Virile Vanguard
Straight away the Chaos team focused on trying to keep the ball contained after receiving it, two of the Vanguard who initially skipped past the first line were brutally knocked out upon getting close to the Dubstep's ball carrier. Taking advantage of the new space the Demons ran the ball down the wing, the carrier only releasing the ball via a kick to the face which was applied when he stopped to look at a beastman breaking his own neck at the scrimmage line.
Taking advantage of the commotion the elves scooped the ball up and sent it flying to the opposite side of the pitch, allowing the unmarked elves to run it back down towards the Chaos touchline. A last ditch tackle attempt by a beastman was cut short when he tripped over his own tail, allowing the Vanguard Lineman to complete the run and get the first touchdown of the match.
The restart saw the Vanguard hoofing the ball to the Chaos touchline, catching the team unprepared and sprinting up the pitch after it. Surging forward the teams collided in the middle of the Dubstep's half, the resulting scuffle seeing a beastman sent off for fouling and the apparently greased ball sliding out of the hands of anyone trying to pick it up.
After the referee decided the ball needed cleaning, the second half restart saw the elves adopt an unusual tactic for teams of their fragility and uncharacteristically bash their way up the wing. The winds of Chaos are known to be fickle and today was no different, the 'Demons struggling to keep their footing and allowing the Vanguard to push home their second touchdown despite being outnumbered.
A last ditch attempt in the final minutes by Coach Elvis Duck saw the Chaos fence the ball in and turtle down the pitch via the use of violence, smashing the ankle of an elf on the way down. The push was cut short when a Chaos Warrior stretched too far and fell over at the feet of the last defending Vanguard player, giving the elves the opportunity to run to his aid and cage in the Chaos turtle in the last seconds.
Result: 0-2 to the Virile Vanguard
Straight away the Chaos team focused on trying to keep the ball contained after receiving it, two of the Vanguard who initially skipped past the first line were brutally knocked out upon getting close to the Dubstep's ball carrier. Taking advantage of the new space the Demons ran the ball down the wing, the carrier only releasing the ball via a kick to the face which was applied when he stopped to look at a beastman breaking his own neck at the scrimmage line.
Taking advantage of the commotion the elves scooped the ball up and sent it flying to the opposite side of the pitch, allowing the unmarked elves to run it back down towards the Chaos touchline. A last ditch tackle attempt by a beastman was cut short when he tripped over his own tail, allowing the Vanguard Lineman to complete the run and get the first touchdown of the match.
The restart saw the Vanguard hoofing the ball to the Chaos touchline, catching the team unprepared and sprinting up the pitch after it. Surging forward the teams collided in the middle of the Dubstep's half, the resulting scuffle seeing a beastman sent off for fouling and the apparently greased ball sliding out of the hands of anyone trying to pick it up.
After the referee decided the ball needed cleaning, the second half restart saw the elves adopt an unusual tactic for teams of their fragility and uncharacteristically bash their way up the wing. The winds of Chaos are known to be fickle and today was no different, the 'Demons struggling to keep their footing and allowing the Vanguard to push home their second touchdown despite being outnumbered.
A last ditch attempt in the final minutes by Coach Elvis Duck saw the Chaos fence the ball in and turtle down the pitch via the use of violence, smashing the ankle of an elf on the way down. The push was cut short when a Chaos Warrior stretched too far and fell over at the feet of the last defending Vanguard player, giving the elves the opportunity to run to his aid and cage in the Chaos turtle in the last seconds.
Result: 0-2 to the Virile Vanguard
Darkhole Penetrators Vs Volga Wolfbaggers
Right from the off the penetrators made it clear that they were on the field to fight. Fronting up to the Norse they kick the ball off in order to be able to concentrate on the fighting. The Norsemen love a fight too though, and retaliate by bulldozing forward across the line and knocking out the rented Star Player. With the strong centrepiece of Susan the Yhetee and a pair of werewolves, the Penetrators line buckles and allows the Norse ball carrier to be escorted through the line of Beastmen by the frenzied Wolfbagger Berserker winger. The Chaos players who look up from their fighting long enough to notice give chase, but can't catch the Wolfbagger Lineman as he romps home to an early touchdown. Stung by their lack of attention, the Penetrators play the ball after receiving. Caging up the press down their right flank, but get bogged down by the punchy 'Baggers and after some hard fighting the ball gets loose. It's looking like half time will come with the ball in no-man's land, but a plucky dash and hand-off through a crowded pitch enables a Berserker to run in a lucky last minute touchdown for the Norse team just before the whistle. While other teams may have been demoralised by conceding two TDs in the first half, the Penetrators leave the pitch in good spirits after one of the Chaos Warrior blockers gets a league first - taking down two players with one punch in a domino effect that flattened the target and knocked his buddy behind him off the edge of the pitch.
The second half sets off to a good start for the away team. Kicking off, the Norse kicker accurately drops the ball short on the Penetrators' slightly weaker right flank, and the Wolfbagger fans spot them gearing up for the famous Smash n Grab set piece. Blisfully unaware, a Beastman half-heartedly picks the ball up only to suddenly find himself pounded by a raging Berserker. The Smash done, the Wolfbaggers couldn't manage the Grab, but do take the ball home for a third touchdown. Kicking short after the reset, the Wolfbaggers this time make a proper job of the Smash n Grab routine. Catching the Offensive team flat-footed, the Norsemen smash through the right flank again and this time manage to get a man under the ball before it even hit the ground. The Lineman failed to keep hold of it, but with 5 players around the ball the Penetrators were unable to rally fast enough to get a hand on, and the Wolfbaggers sprint on for a very rapid touchdown. By this point it is clear that the Chaos team are showing little regard for the ball, preferring to kick the shit out of the hairy chaps on the line of scrummage (presumably for not playing on their side). With the minutes ticking away the Penetrators cage the ball and make a stand to fight on their terms before the whistle. Seeing a challenge, the Wolfbaggers send in blitzer after blitzer to repeatedly knock the ball carrier around, but a cheeky last minute fifth run can't be found. The whistle blows and the Wolfbaggers leave the pitch to a roaring crowd, while the Penetrators all go to draw cocks on the face of the hired Star Player, who was still asleep in the dugout after his KO at the very start of the match.
Result: Penetrators 0 - Wolfbaggers 4
Right from the off the penetrators made it clear that they were on the field to fight. Fronting up to the Norse they kick the ball off in order to be able to concentrate on the fighting. The Norsemen love a fight too though, and retaliate by bulldozing forward across the line and knocking out the rented Star Player. With the strong centrepiece of Susan the Yhetee and a pair of werewolves, the Penetrators line buckles and allows the Norse ball carrier to be escorted through the line of Beastmen by the frenzied Wolfbagger Berserker winger. The Chaos players who look up from their fighting long enough to notice give chase, but can't catch the Wolfbagger Lineman as he romps home to an early touchdown. Stung by their lack of attention, the Penetrators play the ball after receiving. Caging up the press down their right flank, but get bogged down by the punchy 'Baggers and after some hard fighting the ball gets loose. It's looking like half time will come with the ball in no-man's land, but a plucky dash and hand-off through a crowded pitch enables a Berserker to run in a lucky last minute touchdown for the Norse team just before the whistle. While other teams may have been demoralised by conceding two TDs in the first half, the Penetrators leave the pitch in good spirits after one of the Chaos Warrior blockers gets a league first - taking down two players with one punch in a domino effect that flattened the target and knocked his buddy behind him off the edge of the pitch.
The second half sets off to a good start for the away team. Kicking off, the Norse kicker accurately drops the ball short on the Penetrators' slightly weaker right flank, and the Wolfbagger fans spot them gearing up for the famous Smash n Grab set piece. Blisfully unaware, a Beastman half-heartedly picks the ball up only to suddenly find himself pounded by a raging Berserker. The Smash done, the Wolfbaggers couldn't manage the Grab, but do take the ball home for a third touchdown. Kicking short after the reset, the Wolfbaggers this time make a proper job of the Smash n Grab routine. Catching the Offensive team flat-footed, the Norsemen smash through the right flank again and this time manage to get a man under the ball before it even hit the ground. The Lineman failed to keep hold of it, but with 5 players around the ball the Penetrators were unable to rally fast enough to get a hand on, and the Wolfbaggers sprint on for a very rapid touchdown. By this point it is clear that the Chaos team are showing little regard for the ball, preferring to kick the shit out of the hairy chaps on the line of scrummage (presumably for not playing on their side). With the minutes ticking away the Penetrators cage the ball and make a stand to fight on their terms before the whistle. Seeing a challenge, the Wolfbaggers send in blitzer after blitzer to repeatedly knock the ball carrier around, but a cheeky last minute fifth run can't be found. The whistle blows and the Wolfbaggers leave the pitch to a roaring crowd, while the Penetrators all go to draw cocks on the face of the hired Star Player, who was still asleep in the dugout after his KO at the very start of the match.
Result: Penetrators 0 - Wolfbaggers 4
There's nothing to stop us going to the second leg anyway, it's just that by finishing the first it evens up everyone's experience and stops people steaming off into the lead. If a team can't play for some reason they can just sit out their games and the league ends without theirs being played. This is 5punk after all, can't expect us to actually finish something.
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FatherJack
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Do we have to make sure the correct team invites to ensure a reverse of the first-round fixture, or does it just work it out, or do we not really give a shit as "home" status doesn't seem to confer any particular advantage?
If we do have to get it the right way round, which way is it? In the UK, the home teams are listed first, but in the US it's the other way around.
If we do have to get it the right way round, which way is it? In the UK, the home teams are listed first, but in the US it's the other way around.
Darkhole Penetrators Vs The Special Uncles
The penetrators first game with a full roster after their last few abysmal matches saw them pitted against them Skaven team The special uncles, slightly worried about the oppositions superior running game and natural agility after their game with the Wolfbaggers, they decided the best course of action would be the classic* chaos tactic of punch wildy untill theres nothing left moving.
And for once it worked, the Penetrators quickly delivered a fatal blow to the Uncles big fella and proceeded to cause as much damage as possible to whatever was within arms reach, a short while later a beastman that was missing out on the fun decided hed pick up the leathery oval thing on the floor for a taste when suddenly the rest of his team boxed him in dwarf style and knocked out anyone who tried to get to him. Once most of the Uncles where in the dugout the Penetrators let the beastman free to run up the pitch and score a touchdown just before halftime.
The second half saw the uncles team severely hindered in numbers, and unable to get through the wall of chaos warriors it soon turned into half a match of who can cause the most damage, and the Penetrators came prepared, taking every cheap shot they could see and taking their second victory of the season.
*the only
Result: Penetrators 1 - The Special Uncles 0
The penetrators first game with a full roster after their last few abysmal matches saw them pitted against them Skaven team The special uncles, slightly worried about the oppositions superior running game and natural agility after their game with the Wolfbaggers, they decided the best course of action would be the classic* chaos tactic of punch wildy untill theres nothing left moving.
And for once it worked, the Penetrators quickly delivered a fatal blow to the Uncles big fella and proceeded to cause as much damage as possible to whatever was within arms reach, a short while later a beastman that was missing out on the fun decided hed pick up the leathery oval thing on the floor for a taste when suddenly the rest of his team boxed him in dwarf style and knocked out anyone who tried to get to him. Once most of the Uncles where in the dugout the Penetrators let the beastman free to run up the pitch and score a touchdown just before halftime.
The second half saw the uncles team severely hindered in numbers, and unable to get through the wall of chaos warriors it soon turned into half a match of who can cause the most damage, and the Penetrators came prepared, taking every cheap shot they could see and taking their second victory of the season.
*the only
Result: Penetrators 1 - The Special Uncles 0
Interesting sounding match. That's bumped the Penetrators above the Special Uncles by a point. Apart from FJ's Horses, who are third anyway, everyone else with matches to play can potentially move up at least a place, possibly two with decent goal difference. There's four matches remaining in the first leg:
Virile Vanguard Vs Darkhole Penetrators
Dubstep Demons Vs Darkhole Penetrators
Dubstep Demons Vs I've A Horse Outside
Dubstep Demons Vs The Special Uncles
Virile Vanguard Vs Darkhole Penetrators
Dubstep Demons Vs Darkhole Penetrators
Dubstep Demons Vs I've A Horse Outside
Dubstep Demons Vs The Special Uncles
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FatherJack
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Roman Totale
- Robotic Bumlord
- Posts: 8475
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 0:27
- Location: Manchester, UK
Next time I'll come onto TS and call you a bummer insteadI've been considering where to go next with this. First off, I think after the first leg we should either close the league and announce the results or offer an opt-out for those who are unable to continue or have lost interest. Secondly, I think a third 5punky league might be a good idea. Thus:
5punky Cup - Open league for friendlies
Keys Bowl - Competitive league with seasons of new teams
Veterans League - Competitive league for experienced teams of any level
This allows people to carry on using their teams in a competitive capacity without outgunning people who either want to start a new team or are new to the game.
Actually running another competitive league might be tricky now that the initial interest has subsided, although I'm more than happy to play on.
5punky Cup - Open league for friendlies
Keys Bowl - Competitive league with seasons of new teams
Veterans League - Competitive league for experienced teams of any level
This allows people to carry on using their teams in a competitive capacity without outgunning people who either want to start a new team or are new to the game.
Actually running another competitive league might be tricky now that the initial interest has subsided, although I'm more than happy to play on.
Dubstep Demons vs Special Uncles
In this long awaited match up between the 6th and 7th place team, the match between the Dubstep Demons and the Special Uncles got off to a stuttering start, with both managers finding it tricky to get out of the dressing room. At one point, Fabyak, the manager of the Special Uncles, was convinced he had the correct door to get out onto the pitch, confidently strode through it and closed it behind him only to find himself in the car park. At this point, bewildered onlookers watched on as he got into his car, closed the door, and then opened it again and got straight back out. Whether this was part of some archaic ritual it is still not clear, however after this both managers were able to make their way onto the field without any further problems.
The game began with the Special Uncles kicking off and the Chaos warriors quickly surround the ball as the Skaven and Chaos players begin slapping each other about. The light hearted feel to the match changes as the ref spots a stamp from one of the Dubstep Demons and sends him from the field. After this point the rats continue slapping their opponents to no great effect and the Demons respond by injuring one of the Skaven players. At this point the Chaos warriors get bored of this and attack the Skaven in anger, causing an injury to one of their players and breaking away down the field where the pursuing Uncles use their pushing skills to shove the runner off the field. The Skaven tried to grab the ball but fumbled it passing play back to the Demons who capitalised on this by injuring a second Skaven player, taking possession of the ball and setting off down the field again. He was met by stern resistance as the Skaven manage to form an attack and knock out the runner, leaving the ball loose. As the Skaven try to slap their opponents around as half time approaches, they forget about the ball and are greeted by the sight of a charging Chaos Warrior bearing down on them. There are gasps of surprise around the stadium and in the dugout as he somehow manages to pick up the ball. He looks as shocked as everyone else, especially when the Skaven surround him and finish off the first half by inflicting their first injury of the game
As the second half kicks off the weather changes and the players are dealing with sweltering heat. This seems to galvanise the Special Uncles as they secure 2 successive knockouts to the Demon’s front line leaving a gap in the defence that the Skaven capitalise on as they break down the field. The Demons succeed in taking down the runner but the ball goes loose and on their next turn the Uncles are able to gather it up and race across the line for the first touchdown of the game. The excessive heat results in both teams being heavily down on players, with just 5 of the Dubstep Demons taking to the pitch to face off against 6 Special Uncles. This period of play begins well for the Skaven of the Special Uncles as they knock down most of the Demons, and are able to bundle another of their players over the sidelines and into the spectators. They get a bit over-confident in one attack which results in the Skaven attacker getting taken down, but he injures his opponent in the process. This left the Demons very low on active players and the Uncles were able to run the ball deep into their half almost unopposed. While the ref was watching the runner some of the Uncles decided to try and touch some of the downed players, but the ref spotted this, decided it was inappropriate and sent the offending player from the pitch. At the restart the Special Uncles form a solid line to face off against the lone Dubstep Demon who has taken to the field and begin asking him if he wants to be in their gang. However as soon as their formation is decided another 5 players jog onto the pitch leaving the Special Uncles slightly afraid of the repercussions from their touching exploits. This fear is short lived as the final play of the match passes without injury to either side and the match ends with victory to the Special Uncles
Result: Dubstep Demons 0 - 2 Special Uncles
In this long awaited match up between the 6th and 7th place team, the match between the Dubstep Demons and the Special Uncles got off to a stuttering start, with both managers finding it tricky to get out of the dressing room. At one point, Fabyak, the manager of the Special Uncles, was convinced he had the correct door to get out onto the pitch, confidently strode through it and closed it behind him only to find himself in the car park. At this point, bewildered onlookers watched on as he got into his car, closed the door, and then opened it again and got straight back out. Whether this was part of some archaic ritual it is still not clear, however after this both managers were able to make their way onto the field without any further problems.
The game began with the Special Uncles kicking off and the Chaos warriors quickly surround the ball as the Skaven and Chaos players begin slapping each other about. The light hearted feel to the match changes as the ref spots a stamp from one of the Dubstep Demons and sends him from the field. After this point the rats continue slapping their opponents to no great effect and the Demons respond by injuring one of the Skaven players. At this point the Chaos warriors get bored of this and attack the Skaven in anger, causing an injury to one of their players and breaking away down the field where the pursuing Uncles use their pushing skills to shove the runner off the field. The Skaven tried to grab the ball but fumbled it passing play back to the Demons who capitalised on this by injuring a second Skaven player, taking possession of the ball and setting off down the field again. He was met by stern resistance as the Skaven manage to form an attack and knock out the runner, leaving the ball loose. As the Skaven try to slap their opponents around as half time approaches, they forget about the ball and are greeted by the sight of a charging Chaos Warrior bearing down on them. There are gasps of surprise around the stadium and in the dugout as he somehow manages to pick up the ball. He looks as shocked as everyone else, especially when the Skaven surround him and finish off the first half by inflicting their first injury of the game
As the second half kicks off the weather changes and the players are dealing with sweltering heat. This seems to galvanise the Special Uncles as they secure 2 successive knockouts to the Demon’s front line leaving a gap in the defence that the Skaven capitalise on as they break down the field. The Demons succeed in taking down the runner but the ball goes loose and on their next turn the Uncles are able to gather it up and race across the line for the first touchdown of the game. The excessive heat results in both teams being heavily down on players, with just 5 of the Dubstep Demons taking to the pitch to face off against 6 Special Uncles. This period of play begins well for the Skaven of the Special Uncles as they knock down most of the Demons, and are able to bundle another of their players over the sidelines and into the spectators. They get a bit over-confident in one attack which results in the Skaven attacker getting taken down, but he injures his opponent in the process. This left the Demons very low on active players and the Uncles were able to run the ball deep into their half almost unopposed. While the ref was watching the runner some of the Uncles decided to try and touch some of the downed players, but the ref spotted this, decided it was inappropriate and sent the offending player from the pitch. At the restart the Special Uncles form a solid line to face off against the lone Dubstep Demon who has taken to the field and begin asking him if he wants to be in their gang. However as soon as their formation is decided another 5 players jog onto the pitch leaving the Special Uncles slightly afraid of the repercussions from their touching exploits. This fear is short lived as the final play of the match passes without injury to either side and the match ends with victory to the Special Uncles
Result: Dubstep Demons 0 - 2 Special Uncles