5punk Awards 2009
Posted: January 9th, 2010, 21:26
The votes are in for the 5punk awards for 2009:
New Single Player Game 2009
This is the game voted the best single player release of this year. In a year devoid of any serious multiplayer titles to take our time from us, this could have been a tough fight. However, one game has blown away all competition with 86% of our votes. A massive game by modern standards, which in this era of so called MMORPGs has shown us just what a true roleplaying game is and what future ones should be.
Dragon Age: Origins
New Multiplayer Game 2009
This is the game voted the best multiplayer release of this year. There has been no unifying game as there has in previous years, such as with Battlefield 2 and Call of Duty 4, but even so one game has taken the lead as clear winner with 47% of the votes. What is more remarkable is that this game is from a genre traditionally not popular with 5punkers, but its the silly antics and a soundtrack which could have been hand picked for has shone through.
Burnout Paradise
5punky Game of the Year 2009
This is the game that has caused the most 5punky hilarity this year, regardless of its year of release. A close call between two popular games, both of which have caused much mirth on Teamspeak. One is a long running favourite with entire threads dedicated to the sillies caused, the other a surprise pretender who nonetheless packed more squeals of outrage and photographs of Mr Johnson into every minute of the game than almost any other game we've played. In the end quality won over quantity, with deliberate 5punky lunacy as the objective of the game and a perfectly functioning webcam integration which shows you your opponent's outraged grimace to match their incredulous laughter.
Burnout Paradise
Meat Shield 2009
The Meat Shield award is given to the 5punker who had spent the most time waiting to respawn this year. Everyone has had them in their sights, and on their knife, and then teabagged their steaming corpse. Far from a wooden spoon, though, the Meat Shield is the epitome of the 5punky game. We're shit, and we know we are. Meat Shield, we salute you!
Buzzmong
Master of Rings 2009
The Master of Rings award is given to the 5punker who has done the most this year to attract new members and make the place somewhere existing members would like to stay. With new membership again low this year, the importance of this award is greater than ever, and as such it is all the greater accolade. While there have been several 5punkers who have been working tirelessly to keep the place alive and interesting, one has run away with the poll. Introducing new members even in a time of gaming drought and real life concerns, while keeping the disco board trotting along at a lively pace, this 5punker can consider himself the beating heart of our horse bumming community.
Grimmie
Funny cupcake 2009
The Funny cupcake award is given to the 5punker who has made us laugh the most this year. The Funny cupcake is a king among kings. Or a one eyed man in the valley of the blind. Either way this year's winner was streets ahead of the competition, combining dry humour on TS with outrageous puns on the boards, and finally with a post that not only would most people have kept to themselves, but one which would have been perfectly in place in many sitcoms. Deliberately or not, you're a funny cupcake.
Roman Totale
OMG Haxxor 2009
The OMG Haxxor award goes to the 5punker who is clearly hacking because they're too good. Shame on them. This year was a close call, with 5% in it and a good number of nominations. Strangely enough though it has taken a departure from the usual FPS domination and has been awarded to the 5punker who has been publicly beating Joose for half the year at Blood Bowl. How embarrassing...
Dog Pants
Liver of the Year 2009
The Liver of the Year award goes to that most abused of organs belonging to the 5punker who has done the mose to abuse it. However, it's not enough to be a raging alcoholic (and there'd be too much competition anyway), but to be drunk and disorderly in view of other 5punkers. Of course it shouldn't be something we encourage, but we do anyway. This award is always hotly contested, often ending in a tie. With Ty. And this year is no exception.
Friznit/Ty AKA Sir DieALoTy
Potential Vampire 2009
The award for Most Potential as a Vampire 2009 is awarded to the 5punker who has seen the least daylight this year. Day or night they can be seen slogging away at one game or another on Xfire, making us all wish we had more free time. The Vampire award has historically been a one horse (bummer) race, but this year had three strong contenders. The winner, though, took the lead from a prodigious amount of time put into this year's SP Game of the Year, Dragon Age: Origins. Having played the game from start to end at least seven times. he'd finished it twice before anyone else had done it once. Must be the availability of Mountain Dew or Jolt. Maybe we can get a sponsorship.
Akiakaiu
Talented Bastard 2009
The Talented Bastard award goes to the 5punker who has displayed skills which make us all envious. Seperate to the Haxxor award, this is more for creative skills. Since creative talent isn't something that develops spontaneously this tends to be the domain of a select few 5punkers, however this year a triumvirate of creative writers have entered the fray. Creating detailed worlds with a thousand words, the driving horses behind the beards forum have caused a steep rise in popularity of forum based pen and paper RPGs. Although not for some, it seems as many people enjoy reading them as do playing them.
Dog Pants/Joose/HereComesPete
5punker of the Year
The 5punker of the Year award is given to the 5punker who has done the most overall for the site. Giving up their time and effort to keep the site lively and active, and going above and beyond for the benefit of all. This year has been taxing for many of us, and the life and times of friends electric will never feature highly on a list of anyone's priorities when real life is tough. However, not only have we stuck together and kept the 5punky spirit alive, we've been there to support each other through hardships and strain. Strange as it is, this year's award goes to the community as a whole, for sticking together, sticking with it, and other sticky stuff.
Everybody!
Finally, this year we lost a 5punker. In a small gesture of solidarity these awards are dedicated to him.
New Single Player Game 2009
This is the game voted the best single player release of this year. In a year devoid of any serious multiplayer titles to take our time from us, this could have been a tough fight. However, one game has blown away all competition with 86% of our votes. A massive game by modern standards, which in this era of so called MMORPGs has shown us just what a true roleplaying game is and what future ones should be.
Dragon Age: Origins
New Multiplayer Game 2009
This is the game voted the best multiplayer release of this year. There has been no unifying game as there has in previous years, such as with Battlefield 2 and Call of Duty 4, but even so one game has taken the lead as clear winner with 47% of the votes. What is more remarkable is that this game is from a genre traditionally not popular with 5punkers, but its the silly antics and a soundtrack which could have been hand picked for has shone through.
Burnout Paradise
5punky Game of the Year 2009
This is the game that has caused the most 5punky hilarity this year, regardless of its year of release. A close call between two popular games, both of which have caused much mirth on Teamspeak. One is a long running favourite with entire threads dedicated to the sillies caused, the other a surprise pretender who nonetheless packed more squeals of outrage and photographs of Mr Johnson into every minute of the game than almost any other game we've played. In the end quality won over quantity, with deliberate 5punky lunacy as the objective of the game and a perfectly functioning webcam integration which shows you your opponent's outraged grimace to match their incredulous laughter.
Burnout Paradise
Meat Shield 2009
The Meat Shield award is given to the 5punker who had spent the most time waiting to respawn this year. Everyone has had them in their sights, and on their knife, and then teabagged their steaming corpse. Far from a wooden spoon, though, the Meat Shield is the epitome of the 5punky game. We're shit, and we know we are. Meat Shield, we salute you!
Buzzmong
Master of Rings 2009
The Master of Rings award is given to the 5punker who has done the most this year to attract new members and make the place somewhere existing members would like to stay. With new membership again low this year, the importance of this award is greater than ever, and as such it is all the greater accolade. While there have been several 5punkers who have been working tirelessly to keep the place alive and interesting, one has run away with the poll. Introducing new members even in a time of gaming drought and real life concerns, while keeping the disco board trotting along at a lively pace, this 5punker can consider himself the beating heart of our horse bumming community.
Grimmie
Funny cupcake 2009
The Funny cupcake award is given to the 5punker who has made us laugh the most this year. The Funny cupcake is a king among kings. Or a one eyed man in the valley of the blind. Either way this year's winner was streets ahead of the competition, combining dry humour on TS with outrageous puns on the boards, and finally with a post that not only would most people have kept to themselves, but one which would have been perfectly in place in many sitcoms. Deliberately or not, you're a funny cupcake.
Roman Totale
OMG Haxxor 2009
The OMG Haxxor award goes to the 5punker who is clearly hacking because they're too good. Shame on them. This year was a close call, with 5% in it and a good number of nominations. Strangely enough though it has taken a departure from the usual FPS domination and has been awarded to the 5punker who has been publicly beating Joose for half the year at Blood Bowl. How embarrassing...
Dog Pants
Liver of the Year 2009
The Liver of the Year award goes to that most abused of organs belonging to the 5punker who has done the mose to abuse it. However, it's not enough to be a raging alcoholic (and there'd be too much competition anyway), but to be drunk and disorderly in view of other 5punkers. Of course it shouldn't be something we encourage, but we do anyway. This award is always hotly contested, often ending in a tie. With Ty. And this year is no exception.
Friznit/Ty AKA Sir DieALoTy
Potential Vampire 2009
The award for Most Potential as a Vampire 2009 is awarded to the 5punker who has seen the least daylight this year. Day or night they can be seen slogging away at one game or another on Xfire, making us all wish we had more free time. The Vampire award has historically been a one horse (bummer) race, but this year had three strong contenders. The winner, though, took the lead from a prodigious amount of time put into this year's SP Game of the Year, Dragon Age: Origins. Having played the game from start to end at least seven times. he'd finished it twice before anyone else had done it once. Must be the availability of Mountain Dew or Jolt. Maybe we can get a sponsorship.
Akiakaiu
Talented Bastard 2009
The Talented Bastard award goes to the 5punker who has displayed skills which make us all envious. Seperate to the Haxxor award, this is more for creative skills. Since creative talent isn't something that develops spontaneously this tends to be the domain of a select few 5punkers, however this year a triumvirate of creative writers have entered the fray. Creating detailed worlds with a thousand words, the driving horses behind the beards forum have caused a steep rise in popularity of forum based pen and paper RPGs. Although not for some, it seems as many people enjoy reading them as do playing them.
Dog Pants/Joose/HereComesPete
5punker of the Year
The 5punker of the Year award is given to the 5punker who has done the most overall for the site. Giving up their time and effort to keep the site lively and active, and going above and beyond for the benefit of all. This year has been taxing for many of us, and the life and times of friends electric will never feature highly on a list of anyone's priorities when real life is tough. However, not only have we stuck together and kept the 5punky spirit alive, we've been there to support each other through hardships and strain. Strange as it is, this year's award goes to the community as a whole, for sticking together, sticking with it, and other sticky stuff.
Everybody!
Finally, this year we lost a 5punker. In a small gesture of solidarity these awards are dedicated to him.
also, most excellent trophies Grimmie! VINNERS SALUT! 
Bioware for such a good game, and all you 5punkers for making me check the site to see if I'm ever missing something good. 
