Blood Bowl - Keys Bowl 5punk League
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- Robotic Bumlord
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Mad Dogs & Deadmen vs Dubstep Demons
The Mad Dogs kick off and the Demons carry the ball to the left flank of the half way line, caging the ball in with Beastmen. Over the next few turns the ball only creeps forwards a few squares, and is seemingly entrenched just over the half way line. After a prolonged assault from the Deadmen, the Demons suffer from their lack of re-rolls and lose the ball (and a player) over the side lines.
The crowd enthusiastically launch the ball (and parts of the player) back on to the pitch. The other side of the pitch, now quite barren of players. The Mad Dogs pick up the ball and begin their own advance down the pitch in a mirror image of the Demons' own attack. Similarly a war of attrition takes place and the ball only manages to advance a few more squares. It's like World War I, but with werewolves and beastmen. The first half ends even on score, but the Dubsteppers having suffered more casualties.
The second half begins and the ball is kicked to the Deadmen, practically right on the half way line. A solid block of Beastmen, undead, golems and chaos warriors crams around as each team tries, and fails, to pick up the ball. It eventually breaks free back in the Demons' where it is picked up, but the beastmen are unable to form an effective cage around it. Seeing this weakness the Mad Dogs blitz in and recover the ball midway through enemy territory.
With most of the players tied up in the centre, both sides have difficulty getting bodies around the ball. The Mad Dogs lose possession on the right flank, and the Demons carry it back over the half way line again. Undeterred, a lone geist from the Mad Dogs team skips past 3 beastmen and 1 chaos warrior to recover the ball. Scintillating stuff!
The clock is ticking down but the ball is still only near the halfway line. Alas, the geist doesn't have enough back up. The beastmen and chaos warrior he skipped past before are now looming over him - with a crunch he loses the ball and possibly his collar bone. The horses of chaos once more have the ball, and they are in the Deadmen's half. The centre circle is now awash with blood, and we're on to the last move of the game. With no one to stop him, the ball bearing beastman charges in a touch down and the game comes to an end.
A very close game. Only one goal, but it was still a nail (hoof?) biter.
Mad Dogs & Deadmen 0 - Dubstep Demons 1
The Mad Dogs kick off and the Demons carry the ball to the left flank of the half way line, caging the ball in with Beastmen. Over the next few turns the ball only creeps forwards a few squares, and is seemingly entrenched just over the half way line. After a prolonged assault from the Deadmen, the Demons suffer from their lack of re-rolls and lose the ball (and a player) over the side lines.
The crowd enthusiastically launch the ball (and parts of the player) back on to the pitch. The other side of the pitch, now quite barren of players. The Mad Dogs pick up the ball and begin their own advance down the pitch in a mirror image of the Demons' own attack. Similarly a war of attrition takes place and the ball only manages to advance a few more squares. It's like World War I, but with werewolves and beastmen. The first half ends even on score, but the Dubsteppers having suffered more casualties.
The second half begins and the ball is kicked to the Deadmen, practically right on the half way line. A solid block of Beastmen, undead, golems and chaos warriors crams around as each team tries, and fails, to pick up the ball. It eventually breaks free back in the Demons' where it is picked up, but the beastmen are unable to form an effective cage around it. Seeing this weakness the Mad Dogs blitz in and recover the ball midway through enemy territory.
With most of the players tied up in the centre, both sides have difficulty getting bodies around the ball. The Mad Dogs lose possession on the right flank, and the Demons carry it back over the half way line again. Undeterred, a lone geist from the Mad Dogs team skips past 3 beastmen and 1 chaos warrior to recover the ball. Scintillating stuff!
The clock is ticking down but the ball is still only near the halfway line. Alas, the geist doesn't have enough back up. The beastmen and chaos warrior he skipped past before are now looming over him - with a crunch he loses the ball and possibly his collar bone. The horses of chaos once more have the ball, and they are in the Deadmen's half. The centre circle is now awash with blood, and we're on to the last move of the game. With no one to stop him, the ball bearing beastman charges in a touch down and the game comes to an end.
A very close game. Only one goal, but it was still a nail (hoof?) biter.
Mad Dogs & Deadmen 0 - Dubstep Demons 1
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Applied for league, with dwarves since I don't really know the new races, though I did do better in SP with Lizardmen.
My new
logo pack.
My new
logo pack.
Last edited by FatherJack on April 9th, 2011, 15:22, edited 1 time in total.
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The Special Uncles Vs Volga Wolfbaggers
Facing off against the competition leaders, the rats of the Special Uncles impetuously surge forward, unfazed and cheering their motto of "The Safeword is No!" Within seconds the Skaven ball carrier is threatening a touchdown, but rallying against the penetrating runner the Wolfbaggers pounce and retrieve the ball. The remainder of the half is a game of manoeuvres as the Wolfbaggers push forwards and the Special Uncles dodge into the ball carrier's cage to harry him. Shortly before the end of the half though, and despite a couple of ambitious pass attempts, the Norsemen carry the ball across the line.
The second half loses much of the speed of the game, and the ball travels in a rough circle around the pitch under the control of the Wolfbaggers. The Norse defences struggle to contain the slippery Skaven and progress is slow and evasive as the Wolfbaggers repeatedly have to recover and press on. Eventually though a break is made, and the Wolfbaggers score. Surprisingly intact for such a lightly armoured team, the Special Uncles spend what remaining time they have setting up a rapid touchdown while trying to cause as much damage as possible. It ends in naught though, but relatively speaking coming away from the league champions with no casualties and only two touchdowns conceded is a good result for a fledgeling team.
Special Uncles 0 - Wolfbaggers 2
Facing off against the competition leaders, the rats of the Special Uncles impetuously surge forward, unfazed and cheering their motto of "The Safeword is No!" Within seconds the Skaven ball carrier is threatening a touchdown, but rallying against the penetrating runner the Wolfbaggers pounce and retrieve the ball. The remainder of the half is a game of manoeuvres as the Wolfbaggers push forwards and the Special Uncles dodge into the ball carrier's cage to harry him. Shortly before the end of the half though, and despite a couple of ambitious pass attempts, the Norsemen carry the ball across the line.
The second half loses much of the speed of the game, and the ball travels in a rough circle around the pitch under the control of the Wolfbaggers. The Norse defences struggle to contain the slippery Skaven and progress is slow and evasive as the Wolfbaggers repeatedly have to recover and press on. Eventually though a break is made, and the Wolfbaggers score. Surprisingly intact for such a lightly armoured team, the Special Uncles spend what remaining time they have setting up a rapid touchdown while trying to cause as much damage as possible. It ends in naught though, but relatively speaking coming away from the league champions with no casualties and only two touchdowns conceded is a good result for a fledgeling team.
Special Uncles 0 - Wolfbaggers 2
Volga Wolfbaggers Vs I've A Horse Outside
The Horses take the receiving start with an expertly placed ball right in the far corner. The Wolfbaggers responded with their signature Smash and Grab move, but unable to pierce the Dwarf lines fall short. The first half devolves into a steady backwards and forwards of violence as one team beats some progress against the other before over extending and losing the ball, only to repeat. Despite a lot of fighting, the first half ends with no score and the Wolfbaggers with 8 men.
This time on the offensive, the Wolfbaggers probe the thick Dwarven defences and make a swift break up the right hand flank. The inevitable encroachment of the Horses squeezed the attack dry against the sideline though. Once again, the zombie-like slow advance of the Dwarves contained the ball and, regardless of the changes of possession, crept into the Wolfbaggers' half. By now with only 6 men left, the Wolfbaggers struggled to capitalise on the sacks they made without getting swamped by the horde of Dwarves, and by the closing minutes the Horses were fighting to the Wolfbagger touchline. With scant seconds remaining a lone Werewolf strove to catch the ball carrier through the screen of blockers. Falling short, the Dwarf runner makes the touchdown as the whistle blows to end the Wolfbaggers' unbeaten run.
Wolfbaggers 0 - Horse Outside 1
The Horses take the receiving start with an expertly placed ball right in the far corner. The Wolfbaggers responded with their signature Smash and Grab move, but unable to pierce the Dwarf lines fall short. The first half devolves into a steady backwards and forwards of violence as one team beats some progress against the other before over extending and losing the ball, only to repeat. Despite a lot of fighting, the first half ends with no score and the Wolfbaggers with 8 men.
This time on the offensive, the Wolfbaggers probe the thick Dwarven defences and make a swift break up the right hand flank. The inevitable encroachment of the Horses squeezed the attack dry against the sideline though. Once again, the zombie-like slow advance of the Dwarves contained the ball and, regardless of the changes of possession, crept into the Wolfbaggers' half. By now with only 6 men left, the Wolfbaggers struggled to capitalise on the sacks they made without getting swamped by the horde of Dwarves, and by the closing minutes the Horses were fighting to the Wolfbagger touchline. With scant seconds remaining a lone Werewolf strove to catch the ball carrier through the screen of blockers. Falling short, the Dwarf runner makes the touchdown as the whistle blows to end the Wolfbaggers' unbeaten run.
Wolfbaggers 0 - Horse Outside 1
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- Robotic Bumlord
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I've A Horse Outside Vs Virile Vanguard
The game started with a deep kick into the dwarven end of the field. The 'Horses decided to show their displeasure of having to move a substantial distance by first battering the entire elven scrimmage team to the ground, setting the tone for the rest of the match.
While the elves were struggling to get off the floor, an unlucky fumbed pass by one of the 'Horses saw one of the Vanguard's catchers dodging past the defensive line and nabbing the ball from under dwarven feet. The dwarves however were having none of it and gave the elven runner a stout punch to the goolies.
With the majority of the elven team now on the ground or out of place, the dwarves picked up the ball and waddled unchallenged down to the line to score the first touchdown of the match.
After a quick word on the sidelines, the Vanguard tried a new tactic on recieving the ball. Exploiting their long legs and moving quickly before the 'Horses had a chance to form a new defensive line, the elves charged the ball though a gap and despite running into two of the dwarven rearguard, managed to pass the ball around them and grab an equalising touchdown.
Coach FatherJack is obviously a fan of kicking elves as the second half begin with a flurry of feet and fists, with the dwarven team forcing their way through the elven line and bearing down on the ball carrier. After all small brawl involving most of the remaining elves, I've A Horse Outside's players broke away and moved towards the touchline for their second touchdown, putting them back in the lead.
Faced with being 2-1 down late in the second half, the elven team opted to try and recreate their earlier tactics, a long pass across the entire dwarven defensive line saw the elves yet again manage to skip through a gap and run the length of the pitch, scoring the second equaliser.
The final rounds were played out with the dwarves happily mishandling the ball while knocking nearly all the elves over.
Result: 2-2
The game started with a deep kick into the dwarven end of the field. The 'Horses decided to show their displeasure of having to move a substantial distance by first battering the entire elven scrimmage team to the ground, setting the tone for the rest of the match.
While the elves were struggling to get off the floor, an unlucky fumbed pass by one of the 'Horses saw one of the Vanguard's catchers dodging past the defensive line and nabbing the ball from under dwarven feet. The dwarves however were having none of it and gave the elven runner a stout punch to the goolies.
With the majority of the elven team now on the ground or out of place, the dwarves picked up the ball and waddled unchallenged down to the line to score the first touchdown of the match.
After a quick word on the sidelines, the Vanguard tried a new tactic on recieving the ball. Exploiting their long legs and moving quickly before the 'Horses had a chance to form a new defensive line, the elves charged the ball though a gap and despite running into two of the dwarven rearguard, managed to pass the ball around them and grab an equalising touchdown.
Coach FatherJack is obviously a fan of kicking elves as the second half begin with a flurry of feet and fists, with the dwarven team forcing their way through the elven line and bearing down on the ball carrier. After all small brawl involving most of the remaining elves, I've A Horse Outside's players broke away and moved towards the touchline for their second touchdown, putting them back in the lead.
Faced with being 2-1 down late in the second half, the elven team opted to try and recreate their earlier tactics, a long pass across the entire dwarven defensive line saw the elves yet again manage to skip through a gap and run the length of the pitch, scoring the second equaliser.
The final rounds were played out with the dwarves happily mishandling the ball while knocking nearly all the elves over.
Result: 2-2
Last edited by buzzmong on April 10th, 2011, 15:32, edited 2 times in total.
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The Special Uncles Vs Virile Vanguard
Having learnt from their previous match to capitalise on their speed, the Vanguard surged forward upon receiving the kick and ran the ball past the Special Uncles' initial defensive line in an attempt to get to the line.
Unfortunately for the elven team, the rat like Skaven are nimble on their feet as well, allowing them to catch up to the runner and knock him over, taking the opportunity to put the boot in as well. Luckily for the elves they kept possession and passed the ball backwards down the pitch in an attempt to solidify their position.
Small scuffles broke out between the teams at this point, with the ball being passed between elven hands before a skaven charge had an elf ball carrier shoulder barged off the pitch near and set upon by rabid Skaven fans.
A throw in deep into the Skaven half saw the ball being chased down by a lone member of the Uncles who unfortunately fumbled the pickup before being killed by the elven catcher who'd followed him the pitch. In payment a fast moving Skaven caught up and KO'd the catcher, regaining the ball for Coach Fabyak's team.
An attempt to take advantage of the open Vanguard flank by the Skaven was rebuked by elves moving towards the skaven cage, however the Uncles' Rat Ogre made swift work of the newly defending elves. A pass to an unmarked rat saw the Uncles getting their first ever touch down shortly before half time.
The second half started with a bang, with the elves giving a short kick and putting the ball just behind the skaven line at the side of the pitch before powering though the defense, grabbing the ball and running up the pitch. A last ditch blitz by one of the Uncles was met with a dodge, allowing the Vanguard to even the score.
Unhappy with their lead being taken away Coach Fabyak ordered the Skaven to ignore the ball and sink their claws into the elven players, resulting the death of an elven Lineman and a serious injury inflicted on one of the elven Blitzers. Another attempt by the Skaven to put the boot in, their fourth foul of the game, was this time caught by the ref, causing the offending Uncle to be expelled from the game.
Another assault by the Rat Ogre saw the skavens break a hole in the elven line and despite a desperate defence attempt by a lone elf near the back of the field the skavens got their second touchdown and the lead.
Upon resuming play the skavens again set upon the elven team with claws, making sure the Vanguard's ball carrier couldn't get up the pitch. A sneaky pass saw a catcher break free and run towards the skaven end zone. With the skaven sniffing around mostly ko'd elven team, the catcher had no problem scoring the equaliser in the final seconds of the match.
Result: 2-2 Draw and a death apiece
Having learnt from their previous match to capitalise on their speed, the Vanguard surged forward upon receiving the kick and ran the ball past the Special Uncles' initial defensive line in an attempt to get to the line.
Unfortunately for the elven team, the rat like Skaven are nimble on their feet as well, allowing them to catch up to the runner and knock him over, taking the opportunity to put the boot in as well. Luckily for the elves they kept possession and passed the ball backwards down the pitch in an attempt to solidify their position.
Small scuffles broke out between the teams at this point, with the ball being passed between elven hands before a skaven charge had an elf ball carrier shoulder barged off the pitch near and set upon by rabid Skaven fans.
A throw in deep into the Skaven half saw the ball being chased down by a lone member of the Uncles who unfortunately fumbled the pickup before being killed by the elven catcher who'd followed him the pitch. In payment a fast moving Skaven caught up and KO'd the catcher, regaining the ball for Coach Fabyak's team.
An attempt to take advantage of the open Vanguard flank by the Skaven was rebuked by elves moving towards the skaven cage, however the Uncles' Rat Ogre made swift work of the newly defending elves. A pass to an unmarked rat saw the Uncles getting their first ever touch down shortly before half time.
The second half started with a bang, with the elves giving a short kick and putting the ball just behind the skaven line at the side of the pitch before powering though the defense, grabbing the ball and running up the pitch. A last ditch blitz by one of the Uncles was met with a dodge, allowing the Vanguard to even the score.
Unhappy with their lead being taken away Coach Fabyak ordered the Skaven to ignore the ball and sink their claws into the elven players, resulting the death of an elven Lineman and a serious injury inflicted on one of the elven Blitzers. Another attempt by the Skaven to put the boot in, their fourth foul of the game, was this time caught by the ref, causing the offending Uncle to be expelled from the game.
Another assault by the Rat Ogre saw the skavens break a hole in the elven line and despite a desperate defence attempt by a lone elf near the back of the field the skavens got their second touchdown and the lead.
Upon resuming play the skavens again set upon the elven team with claws, making sure the Vanguard's ball carrier couldn't get up the pitch. A sneaky pass saw a catcher break free and run towards the skaven end zone. With the skaven sniffing around mostly ko'd elven team, the catcher had no problem scoring the equaliser in the final seconds of the match.
Result: 2-2 Draw and a death apiece
Last edited by buzzmong on April 10th, 2011, 16:57, edited 1 time in total.
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Da Big Fellas Vs I've a Horse Outside
Dwarfs have a reputation for being hard to crack. Ogres have a reputation for causing carnage. The outcome of this game, then, was particularly interesting. Coach Joose went in nervous, as the normal tactic of "Hit things till they stop moving" may have been scuppered by thick dwarvish skulls.
Indeed, for the first half this seemed to be the case. Recovering the ball from a clumsy snotling, the dwarves proved slow, but unstoppable, with the bloodbath the ogres have grown used to replaced with an unwavering sea of beards. Pushing through to a touchdown near the end of the first half, the dwarves looked set to do well, with only a single player in the dugout (albeit in a coffin). This, combined with a KO'd ogre, seemed to light a fire under the Fellas, who spent the second half on better form. Scoring a cheeky "flying snotling" TD to even things up, the ogres set about the dwarfs sending one after another off the pitch. Eventually, there were just not enough plucky dwarves to stop the final score, as three ogres grouped together, had a debate about what limb should be used for holding things, stared into space for a bit, then ate the ball. Thankfully for Joose, they had wandered over the touchdown before their hunger got the better of them.
Result: 2-1
Dwarfs have a reputation for being hard to crack. Ogres have a reputation for causing carnage. The outcome of this game, then, was particularly interesting. Coach Joose went in nervous, as the normal tactic of "Hit things till they stop moving" may have been scuppered by thick dwarvish skulls.
Indeed, for the first half this seemed to be the case. Recovering the ball from a clumsy snotling, the dwarves proved slow, but unstoppable, with the bloodbath the ogres have grown used to replaced with an unwavering sea of beards. Pushing through to a touchdown near the end of the first half, the dwarves looked set to do well, with only a single player in the dugout (albeit in a coffin). This, combined with a KO'd ogre, seemed to light a fire under the Fellas, who spent the second half on better form. Scoring a cheeky "flying snotling" TD to even things up, the ogres set about the dwarfs sending one after another off the pitch. Eventually, there were just not enough plucky dwarves to stop the final score, as three ogres grouped together, had a debate about what limb should be used for holding things, stared into space for a bit, then ate the ball. Thankfully for Joose, they had wandered over the touchdown before their hunger got the better of them.
Result: 2-1
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The Special Uncles vs I've a horse outside
Right from the off, it was clear that the dwarven Horses were out to give the rats a good kicking. Wall-like they plodded forward splattering rodents in their wake, until one dwarf looked up from the bloodbath and having no faces left to put his fist in, seemed to remember the ball. With the Uncles still dazed and licking their wounds, the dwarves shuffled forward and scored a touchdown.
Buoyed by their bullying of the opposition, the Horses seemed to suffer from overconfidence, and began to attempt some passing. Being oafish cack-handed dwarves this naturally failed spectacularly, but the skaven were unable to capitalise before half-time.
The second half began with the Horses again showing signs of complacency, fanning out and attempting to beat the opposition into the ground. However the Uncle's coach must have had a word with them at half time, and they began to take the fight to the dwarves. Groups of rats ganged up on isolated dwarves and slowly thinned their numbers, while edging forward down the right flank. The dwarves began to panic and tried to get back to defend, but their stumpy legs were no match for the skaven's loping speed and the Uncles equalised the match.
The Horses attempted a comeback, but time was against them and the match ended a draw.
Casualties sustained 2-4
Deaths sustained 1-0
KO's sustained 6-0
The Special Uncles 1 - 1 I've a horse outside
Right from the off, it was clear that the dwarven Horses were out to give the rats a good kicking. Wall-like they plodded forward splattering rodents in their wake, until one dwarf looked up from the bloodbath and having no faces left to put his fist in, seemed to remember the ball. With the Uncles still dazed and licking their wounds, the dwarves shuffled forward and scored a touchdown.
Buoyed by their bullying of the opposition, the Horses seemed to suffer from overconfidence, and began to attempt some passing. Being oafish cack-handed dwarves this naturally failed spectacularly, but the skaven were unable to capitalise before half-time.
The second half began with the Horses again showing signs of complacency, fanning out and attempting to beat the opposition into the ground. However the Uncle's coach must have had a word with them at half time, and they began to take the fight to the dwarves. Groups of rats ganged up on isolated dwarves and slowly thinned their numbers, while edging forward down the right flank. The dwarves began to panic and tried to get back to defend, but their stumpy legs were no match for the skaven's loping speed and the Uncles equalised the match.
The Horses attempted a comeback, but time was against them and the match ended a draw.
Casualties sustained 2-4
Deaths sustained 1-0
KO's sustained 6-0
The Special Uncles 1 - 1 I've a horse outside
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Darkhole Penetrators Vs Da Big Fellas
I could wax lyrical about the beastman that was taken out by a charging ogre a step away from a touchdown.
I could entertain with the tale of two chaos guys being taken out in one go from a multi-block.
I could talk about the Penetrators surge of hits against the ogre front line at the beginning of the second half.
I think I only need to tell you one thing to sum up the game though:
Turn 13: There are no Chaos players left on the pitch.
Result: Penetrators 0 - Da Big Fellas 2
I could wax lyrical about the beastman that was taken out by a charging ogre a step away from a touchdown.
I could entertain with the tale of two chaos guys being taken out in one go from a multi-block.
I could talk about the Penetrators surge of hits against the ogre front line at the beginning of the second half.
I think I only need to tell you one thing to sum up the game though:
Turn 13: There are no Chaos players left on the pitch.
Result: Penetrators 0 - Da Big Fellas 2
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The Darkhole Penetrators vs I've a horse outside
The chaos Penetrators clearly set out their stall for a fight. Unfortunately for them, that was exactly what the dwarf Horses had also come for.
After a huge scrap in the middle of the field, with prone players scattered around, a dwarf runner spotted a gap and showed an uncharacteristic burst of speed and burst through. Dazed and bloody, the Penetrators limped after him, but his little legs carried him over the line. Score one to the Horses.
The second half was much like the first, with fights breaking out all over the pitch with many casualties, KOs and a death. After a fumble, the dwarves managed to get hold of the ball, formed a cage and shuffled past a depleted Penetrators team towards the touchline, eventually scoring.
The Darkhole Penetrators 0 - 2 I've a horse outside
The chaos Penetrators clearly set out their stall for a fight. Unfortunately for them, that was exactly what the dwarf Horses had also come for.
After a huge scrap in the middle of the field, with prone players scattered around, a dwarf runner spotted a gap and showed an uncharacteristic burst of speed and burst through. Dazed and bloody, the Penetrators limped after him, but his little legs carried him over the line. Score one to the Horses.
The second half was much like the first, with fights breaking out all over the pitch with many casualties, KOs and a death. After a fumble, the dwarves managed to get hold of the ball, formed a cage and shuffled past a depleted Penetrators team towards the touchline, eventually scoring.
The Darkhole Penetrators 0 - 2 I've a horse outside
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