depends if you spreche or not...Dog Pants wrote:There's an an(ham)agram in there somewhere.
Is there a way to spectate these matches.....wait.. i just asked to spectate a board game didn't i. oh dear
Blood Bowl
Moderator: Forum Moderators
-
Anhamgrimmar
- Ninja Pirate
- Posts: 1517
- Joined: July 17th, 2005, 13:29
- Location: Saaaarfampton
-
Anhamgrimmar
- Ninja Pirate
- Posts: 1517
- Joined: July 17th, 2005, 13:29
- Location: Saaaarfampton
Match Report - Zilla Coldbloods Vs Spuckenoder Swallows
First Half
It's a beautiful day here at the Godzuki stadium as the mass of home fans fling their poo at the vastly outnumbered visiting Dwarves. Steadfast as ever though, the Swallows form up across from the line of Sauren ready to recieve the Coldbloods' kick.
The game starts to loud cheering from the visiting (and immensely drunk) fans, as the Lizardmen punt the ball right behind the Dwarf touchline. Deftly nipping into the line to grab it, a longbeard juggles the ball for a second as he backs away. This is all that's needed for a Coldblood Skink to slip through the Swallows' line and grab the ball out of the air. The Dwarven defence, tied up on the touchline, can only follow as the little lizard races down the pitch to score.
The Coldbloods kick again as the Swallows spread out a little on the touchline ready for the offensive. A poor kick drops the ball into the crowd, and the play begins with one of the Swallows' pair of Runners charging down the right field, leaving the startled Skinks to come to terms with the fact they'll have to turn and face the wrong way down the pitch. Fortunately for the Coldbloods, the roaming Skink back line slows the Dwarf down enough for one of the larger Saurens to elbow his marker out of the way and charge the runner into the away crowd, spilling beer and causing much cursing. As the spectators suck beer out of their beards the touchline turns into a brawl with the Saurens going on the offensive. The distracted defence can do little to stop a Skink taking the ball and hurtling downfield, passing off to another unnoticed reptile runner who goes on to score before the Swallows can properly react. As the first half draws to a close the Dwarves, unfazed by a bad start, taunt the Lizardmen into a brawl that sees one of the Saurens sent off for trying to stamp on his tormentor's throat.
Second Half
The second half begins with the Swallows kicking to the Coldbloods. As the ball lands close behind the Lizard lines it is scooped up and dashed through the Dwarven lines by a nimble Skink. The Swallows rally their defences deeper this time, determined not to repeat the last half, and put several men between the ball and their line as the Skinks switch the ball to a wide runner. Sprinting forward, the little Coldblood ducks around one grasping defender before clothes-lining the second in a stunning show of aggression. With the Swallows' defenders losing ground, the Skink trots off to the opposing touchline for a third touchdown.
As the Coldbloods kick once more, the Swallows thin out their line to defend in depth. The line of Sauren, depleted by their sin-binned teammate, can only square up to a far lighter Dwarven lineup. However, as the Coldbloods prepare to take the kick their mass of fans grab the referee, holding him and whispering threats with their forked tongues. As the ball lands and the Swallows start to pound the Lizard front line the ref, under obvious duress, spots one of the Longbeards taking advantage of their offensive by kicking the hell out of a scrabbling Sauren and sends him off. As the Swallow sulks from the field the Coldbloods' front line continues to take a pounding. Capitalizing on the distraction, a Skink darts from the lines to pick up the ball. This time the Dwarves are ready though. As the Dwarven line starts to dominate the scrummage, Swallows break off to intercept the passing Skink, bringing him down with an Ironbeard. Not to be put off, the Coldbloods have snatched the ball almost as it hits the ground with a followup Skink, dashing through the cage of Swallows. As he grabs the ball, though, the delicate lizard's luck runs out. The cage colapses in on him and he disappears under a pile of Dwarven bodies. As the brawl on the front line turns dirty, with the Dwarven Longbeards concentrating on trying to injure as many prone Saurens as possible, a third Skink grabs the ball from the pile of bodies and dashes to another touchdown.
Another poor kick by the Coldbloods sees the Swallows' runners making a dash down the sideline. Time is short on the clock, but the Runner clears the light Skink defence with little trouble, until he slips on a discarded beer can and knocks himself out, the ball rolling away. The Coldbloods hurtle forwards into their now familiar attack position deep in the opposing half as a Skink dashes the width of the pitch to collect the ball, but the final whistle blows before they can take advantage.
The match ends 4-0 to the Zilla Coldbloods, with the unfortunate visitors leaving with a distinctly bloodied nose and, in the case of the unlucky runner, concussion.
Results: Zilla Coldbloods 4 - 0 Spuckenoder Swallows
First Half
It's a beautiful day here at the Godzuki stadium as the mass of home fans fling their poo at the vastly outnumbered visiting Dwarves. Steadfast as ever though, the Swallows form up across from the line of Sauren ready to recieve the Coldbloods' kick.
The game starts to loud cheering from the visiting (and immensely drunk) fans, as the Lizardmen punt the ball right behind the Dwarf touchline. Deftly nipping into the line to grab it, a longbeard juggles the ball for a second as he backs away. This is all that's needed for a Coldblood Skink to slip through the Swallows' line and grab the ball out of the air. The Dwarven defence, tied up on the touchline, can only follow as the little lizard races down the pitch to score.
The Coldbloods kick again as the Swallows spread out a little on the touchline ready for the offensive. A poor kick drops the ball into the crowd, and the play begins with one of the Swallows' pair of Runners charging down the right field, leaving the startled Skinks to come to terms with the fact they'll have to turn and face the wrong way down the pitch. Fortunately for the Coldbloods, the roaming Skink back line slows the Dwarf down enough for one of the larger Saurens to elbow his marker out of the way and charge the runner into the away crowd, spilling beer and causing much cursing. As the spectators suck beer out of their beards the touchline turns into a brawl with the Saurens going on the offensive. The distracted defence can do little to stop a Skink taking the ball and hurtling downfield, passing off to another unnoticed reptile runner who goes on to score before the Swallows can properly react. As the first half draws to a close the Dwarves, unfazed by a bad start, taunt the Lizardmen into a brawl that sees one of the Saurens sent off for trying to stamp on his tormentor's throat.
Second Half
The second half begins with the Swallows kicking to the Coldbloods. As the ball lands close behind the Lizard lines it is scooped up and dashed through the Dwarven lines by a nimble Skink. The Swallows rally their defences deeper this time, determined not to repeat the last half, and put several men between the ball and their line as the Skinks switch the ball to a wide runner. Sprinting forward, the little Coldblood ducks around one grasping defender before clothes-lining the second in a stunning show of aggression. With the Swallows' defenders losing ground, the Skink trots off to the opposing touchline for a third touchdown.
As the Coldbloods kick once more, the Swallows thin out their line to defend in depth. The line of Sauren, depleted by their sin-binned teammate, can only square up to a far lighter Dwarven lineup. However, as the Coldbloods prepare to take the kick their mass of fans grab the referee, holding him and whispering threats with their forked tongues. As the ball lands and the Swallows start to pound the Lizard front line the ref, under obvious duress, spots one of the Longbeards taking advantage of their offensive by kicking the hell out of a scrabbling Sauren and sends him off. As the Swallow sulks from the field the Coldbloods' front line continues to take a pounding. Capitalizing on the distraction, a Skink darts from the lines to pick up the ball. This time the Dwarves are ready though. As the Dwarven line starts to dominate the scrummage, Swallows break off to intercept the passing Skink, bringing him down with an Ironbeard. Not to be put off, the Coldbloods have snatched the ball almost as it hits the ground with a followup Skink, dashing through the cage of Swallows. As he grabs the ball, though, the delicate lizard's luck runs out. The cage colapses in on him and he disappears under a pile of Dwarven bodies. As the brawl on the front line turns dirty, with the Dwarven Longbeards concentrating on trying to injure as many prone Saurens as possible, a third Skink grabs the ball from the pile of bodies and dashes to another touchdown.
Another poor kick by the Coldbloods sees the Swallows' runners making a dash down the sideline. Time is short on the clock, but the Runner clears the light Skink defence with little trouble, until he slips on a discarded beer can and knocks himself out, the ball rolling away. The Coldbloods hurtle forwards into their now familiar attack position deep in the opposing half as a Skink dashes the width of the pitch to collect the ball, but the final whistle blows before they can take advantage.
The match ends 4-0 to the Zilla Coldbloods, with the unfortunate visitors leaving with a distinctly bloodied nose and, in the case of the unlucky runner, concussion.
Results: Zilla Coldbloods 4 - 0 Spuckenoder Swallows
-
Roman Totale
- Robotic Bumlord
- Posts: 8475
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 0:27
- Location: Manchester, UK
Since there's some interest, here's a quick overview of the 8 races in the 3D game. There are dozens in the Java (and board) version, but I'll not go through all of them. There's a guide to them all here anyway.
Human
Humans are versatile teams open to any tactic. By weighting your player selection in a particular area you can choose pretty much any type of play, even using several in the same game. With tough linemen and blitzers, skilled throwers and catchers, fast runners and huge ogres, Human teams can be tailored to suit any coach's preference or overcome any opponent.
Lizardmen
Lizardmen are very fast, suited to the running game. Unlike some other running teams, they also have a good choice in tough (but also fast) linemen. However, they can be delicate. A Lizardman team should play a mobile game, taking advantage of the fact that even their slowest players are faster than most, finding holes in the opponent's defences and exploiting them to outrun their opponent to the touchline.
Dwarves
Dwarves are slow but extremely tough. The team is weighted towards surrounding the ball carrier with linemen and tanking their way to the opposing line, destroying any opponent stupid enough to get in front of them. Dwarven teams are rarely high scorers, but once they have a solid defensive line they don't need to be as scoring past them can be extermely difficult.
Orcs
Orcs are a tough but versatile team, favouring a brutal charging game but also able to run and throw. The basic orc lineman can quickly punch through an enemy defence and capitalise on it by shielding the ball carrier to the touchline. While the basic blitz tactic will work perfectly well for the Orcs, they also have reasonable throwers and catchers, and access to speedy goblins to dabble in the running game.
Skaven
Skaven are one of the fastest teams in the game, able to exploit small gaps in defences and race to a touchdown. They suffer from being rather weak, though, with very little in the way of strong defensive players. For the Skaven, the best defence usually involves stealing the ball and turning it into an offence.
Chaos
Chaos teams are vicious fighters, and are capable of causing a lot of damage to an opponent. While not hugely skilled, they can often win a game just by destroying the opponent before walking to the touchline.
Wood Elves
Wood Elves are skilled ball handlers and fast runners, playing the passing and running games well. However, they are very delicate and can quickly become crippled by injuries. A good Wood Elf player can run rings around an opposing team, outpositioning them and throwing the ball over the defence.
Goblins
Goblins aren't the strongest, the most skillful, or the fastest race on the Blood Bowl field. They are the dirtiest though. Their low cost means they can absorb casualties by having high numbers, and their relatively high speed allows them to get around the pitch. However, they have little skill with the ball. The main advantage of the Goblins is their ability to create havoc. Bizarre illegal weapons (chainsaws, pogo sticks, huge ball-and-chains) and blatant fouling are all part of the Goblin game - even more so than actually attempting to score. Should they consider scoring, the Goblins always have the option of taking a troll who can hurl his teammates down the pitch.
Human
Humans are versatile teams open to any tactic. By weighting your player selection in a particular area you can choose pretty much any type of play, even using several in the same game. With tough linemen and blitzers, skilled throwers and catchers, fast runners and huge ogres, Human teams can be tailored to suit any coach's preference or overcome any opponent.
Lizardmen
Lizardmen are very fast, suited to the running game. Unlike some other running teams, they also have a good choice in tough (but also fast) linemen. However, they can be delicate. A Lizardman team should play a mobile game, taking advantage of the fact that even their slowest players are faster than most, finding holes in the opponent's defences and exploiting them to outrun their opponent to the touchline.
Dwarves
Dwarves are slow but extremely tough. The team is weighted towards surrounding the ball carrier with linemen and tanking their way to the opposing line, destroying any opponent stupid enough to get in front of them. Dwarven teams are rarely high scorers, but once they have a solid defensive line they don't need to be as scoring past them can be extermely difficult.
Orcs
Orcs are a tough but versatile team, favouring a brutal charging game but also able to run and throw. The basic orc lineman can quickly punch through an enemy defence and capitalise on it by shielding the ball carrier to the touchline. While the basic blitz tactic will work perfectly well for the Orcs, they also have reasonable throwers and catchers, and access to speedy goblins to dabble in the running game.
Skaven
Skaven are one of the fastest teams in the game, able to exploit small gaps in defences and race to a touchdown. They suffer from being rather weak, though, with very little in the way of strong defensive players. For the Skaven, the best defence usually involves stealing the ball and turning it into an offence.
Chaos
Chaos teams are vicious fighters, and are capable of causing a lot of damage to an opponent. While not hugely skilled, they can often win a game just by destroying the opponent before walking to the touchline.
Wood Elves
Wood Elves are skilled ball handlers and fast runners, playing the passing and running games well. However, they are very delicate and can quickly become crippled by injuries. A good Wood Elf player can run rings around an opposing team, outpositioning them and throwing the ball over the defence.
Goblins
Goblins aren't the strongest, the most skillful, or the fastest race on the Blood Bowl field. They are the dirtiest though. Their low cost means they can absorb casualties by having high numbers, and their relatively high speed allows them to get around the pitch. However, they have little skill with the ball. The main advantage of the Goblins is their ability to create havoc. Bizarre illegal weapons (chainsaws, pogo sticks, huge ball-and-chains) and blatant fouling are all part of the Goblin game - even more so than actually attempting to score. Should they consider scoring, the Goblins always have the option of taking a troll who can hurl his teammates down the pitch.
Match Report - Spuckenoder Swallows Vs Zilla Coldbloods
As the Coldbloods and the Swallows meet again for second leg of their pre-season unfriendlies, the Dwarves find themselves on home ground and with a twinkle in their crinkly little eyes. The Coldblood emerge to raucus chanting from the home crowd, but take to the field with confidence after battering the Swallows 4-0 last game.
First Half
As the Lizardmen prepare to kick both sides set up deep, ready for a running charge by the Skinks as seen in the previous game. However, even the bulky Saurens on the scrimmage line visibly sag as the Swallows set up a huge lawnmower/steamroller contraption in the middle of theirs. The Coldblood coach, Dogpants, rages at the referee for allowing the machine on the pitch, but his outburst falls on deaf ears and his Saurens can only watch as the thing hisses and chugs in front of them. Even as the ball is airborne from the Swallows' kick, the Coldblood fans form a more effective protest than the coach, knocking out one of the Swallows' Ironbeards with a brick thrown more accurately than any of the Lizardmen players could manage. The ball lands on the sideline and is swept up by a runner, as Coach Dogpants scans the crowd in the hope of recruiting the cannily armed fan. The dwarves start to heave the lizard front line back inch by inch as the Skinks stream through the tight gaps in their lines, until with a wheeze and a blast of steam the Deathroller punches a hole in the Coldbloods' line, sending Saurens scattering. Unfortunately for the Swallows, even the biased ref can't ignore the contraption as it reverses back over an unfortunate Sauren with a sickening crunch. The machine is sent off, much to the relief of the surviving members of the opposite team. The remaining Saurens push through the gaps to mark any dwarves who may defend the ball carrier, as the Skinks stream towards him like a volley of missiles. As lizard and dwarf converge around the Swallows' runner, a brawl breaks out ending ultimately with the Coldbloods on top. The remains of the Swallows try to break their markers and things almost look up as a gaggle of Skinks chase the ball around the ground trying to catch it. Their efforts are in vain though as one inevitably manages to grab it, rapidly bounding over the touchline as the whistle blows.
Second Half
The dwarves kick deep into Lizardman territory and immediately slam into their line. Caught by surprise, the Coldblood Saurens are flattened by a line of dwarves that suddenly threatens the quickly advancing Skink ball carrier. Ducking through the throngs of Swallows, the Skink passes the ball through the defences to a teammate who nearly makes it out the other side, but who is brought down at the last possible moment. The game descends into brutality as the Swallows take down another Skink who is trying for the ball, and lose a man to the sin bin by kicking more of the prone lizards. With only one diminutive Skink left between the dwarf team and a touchdown, the Swallows walk on to score, KOing the brave but foolish runner.
Play begins again with a promising rush by the Coldbloods, stringing the ball out along their right flank, but even the nippy Skinks can't outpace the clock, and the ref blows the final whistle for a score draw.
Result: Spuckenoder Swallows 1 - 1 Zilla Coldbloods
As the Coldbloods and the Swallows meet again for second leg of their pre-season unfriendlies, the Dwarves find themselves on home ground and with a twinkle in their crinkly little eyes. The Coldblood emerge to raucus chanting from the home crowd, but take to the field with confidence after battering the Swallows 4-0 last game.
First Half
As the Lizardmen prepare to kick both sides set up deep, ready for a running charge by the Skinks as seen in the previous game. However, even the bulky Saurens on the scrimmage line visibly sag as the Swallows set up a huge lawnmower/steamroller contraption in the middle of theirs. The Coldblood coach, Dogpants, rages at the referee for allowing the machine on the pitch, but his outburst falls on deaf ears and his Saurens can only watch as the thing hisses and chugs in front of them. Even as the ball is airborne from the Swallows' kick, the Coldblood fans form a more effective protest than the coach, knocking out one of the Swallows' Ironbeards with a brick thrown more accurately than any of the Lizardmen players could manage. The ball lands on the sideline and is swept up by a runner, as Coach Dogpants scans the crowd in the hope of recruiting the cannily armed fan. The dwarves start to heave the lizard front line back inch by inch as the Skinks stream through the tight gaps in their lines, until with a wheeze and a blast of steam the Deathroller punches a hole in the Coldbloods' line, sending Saurens scattering. Unfortunately for the Swallows, even the biased ref can't ignore the contraption as it reverses back over an unfortunate Sauren with a sickening crunch. The machine is sent off, much to the relief of the surviving members of the opposite team. The remaining Saurens push through the gaps to mark any dwarves who may defend the ball carrier, as the Skinks stream towards him like a volley of missiles. As lizard and dwarf converge around the Swallows' runner, a brawl breaks out ending ultimately with the Coldbloods on top. The remains of the Swallows try to break their markers and things almost look up as a gaggle of Skinks chase the ball around the ground trying to catch it. Their efforts are in vain though as one inevitably manages to grab it, rapidly bounding over the touchline as the whistle blows.
Second Half
The dwarves kick deep into Lizardman territory and immediately slam into their line. Caught by surprise, the Coldblood Saurens are flattened by a line of dwarves that suddenly threatens the quickly advancing Skink ball carrier. Ducking through the throngs of Swallows, the Skink passes the ball through the defences to a teammate who nearly makes it out the other side, but who is brought down at the last possible moment. The game descends into brutality as the Swallows take down another Skink who is trying for the ball, and lose a man to the sin bin by kicking more of the prone lizards. With only one diminutive Skink left between the dwarf team and a touchdown, the Swallows walk on to score, KOing the brave but foolish runner.
Play begins again with a promising rush by the Coldbloods, stringing the ball out along their right flank, but even the nippy Skinks can't outpace the clock, and the ref blows the final whistle for a score draw.
Result: Spuckenoder Swallows 1 - 1 Zilla Coldbloods
Match Report - Intemperate Interlopers Vs Zilla Coldbloods
As the Zilla Coldbloods travel to play the Intemperate Interlopers for the second set of matches in their pre season unfriendlies, they are treated scorching temperatures. While this is nice to lounge in, though, it's not great for playing Blood Bowl.
First half
Riled by the heat, the thronging Coldblood fans abduct the referee while the Interlopers kick off. The home front line is easily pushed back by the larger Saurus, but this proves to be an impetuous mistake by the lizardmen. The Elven fallback proves to be a feint for manoeuvring space, as a lightning bolt erupts from the crowd to open a hole in the Coldblood front line. As the unlucky wizard is set upon by thousands of Coldblood fans, the Interlopers' star catcher easily slides through the gap. The rear guard Skinks, still considering how best to catch the ball, can only grasp as the nible Elf catcher makes the decision for them, sweeping up the ball as she dodges past on her way to a touchdown.
The effort of the previous down proves too much for both teams in the sweltering sun, and each returns to the field a player down. As the Interlopers kick again the Coldbloods set up a deeper defence. Overcautious and cranky in the heat, the Saurens spend the rest of the half beating up the Elven front line while the Skinks play their favourite game of chasing the ball around behind them. Safe in the lead, the Wood Elves simply try to minimise the damage they recieve until the whistle.
Second Half
The second half gets off to a bad start for the Coldbloods, as one Skink is injured by a Wardancer before he manages to even get near the ball. The lizardmen turn the tables though, hurting the other Wardancer and breaking a catcher's leg. As the Coldbloods focus on bringing pain to the Interlopers for getting ahead, they allow the Elves to skillfully shoot the ball across the width of the pitch to be run down the relatively quiet left field for another touchdown.
The Interlopers kick to a sorry looking Coldbloods team, almost catching their own ball as their racy star catcher snatches it from the sideline before the Skinks have even worked out where it landed. The fans save the day again though as the elf tears up the edge of the pitch, and a nonchalantly protruding leg brings her crashing down and seeing stars of her own. The Coldbloods' own hero, Sssplit, wastes no time in retracing the Elf's steps and taking the ball back over the centre line. Shielded by a larger Saurus clearing the way, the top Skink sails through the Elven lines to score.
The field looks sparse now with both sides almost down to half a team. Skinks dash around the patchy Elven line to grab the nearby ball, but a stray lineman manages to intercept. Bizarrely, the pair have a clash of skulls and both crash to the ground unconscious with the ball spinning between them. The normally relatively subdued Elven crowd are baying for the final whistle as one of the Wardancers reaches for the ball, but with the ref counding down injury time it is snatched from under his nose as a Skink rockets past, diving over the line for a last second equaliser.
Result - Intemperate Interlopers 2 - 2 Zilla Coldbloods
Match Report - Zilla Coldbloods Vs Intemperate Interlopers
First Half
Wise to the Elven tactics after the last game, the Coldbloods' Saurus frontliners concentrate on battering one of the Interlopers' Wardancers as the kicked ball drops close behind them. Always better at home, the new boy Saurus, Gopper, thrills the crowd by opening the game with a fatal forearm smash to an Interloper Lineman's throat right in front of them. One of the Skinks hurdles the twiching corpse as he carries the ball down the sideline, but the Elves rally and the little lizard is KOd when he finds a wall of Interlopers blocking his path. Sore after the loss of his teammate, the Lineman who retrieves the ball takes a kick at the prone Skink's head on the way past, knocking the runner out but getting sent off for his efforts. The game only gets dirtier, and as the Coldbloods quickly run the ball forwards a loitering Sink takes the opportunity to KO the Interlopers' star catcher who has been knocked over in the squabble. The ball carrying Skink presses on, somehow taking out the Elven last man on the way to a touchdown.
A lucky kick sees the Coldbloods grabbing the ball after their kick lands it right in front of their Skink wingers, but the Elven quarterback snatches it back into Interloper possession. Glancing at the clock, the thrower is quickly buried under a pile of reptiles, and the whistle blows for the end of the half as the ball pops out of the pile and lands in the hands of a startled Saurus.
Second Half
The Coldbloods kick into right field, the ball being followed on the ground by a speeding Skink. The hurtling lizard juggles the ball briefly, only securing it after he has bounced if off an Elven catcher. Possession is brief though, as the catcher knocks the Skink over, retrieves the ball, and pauses to lay the boot in. Sprinting down the sideline, the Interloper is crowded by several Lizardmen, but they can do nothing to stop him as he skillfully slips through the throng to score.
Severely depleted now from taking a mauling on the scrimmage line, the Interlopers' remaining five players huddle together on the line. In their efforts to try to draw opposing players away with the ball, though, they kick the ball off the end of the pitch. The outnumbered Wood Elves are quickly boxed in by Saurus, only their star catcher managing to break out to try to intercept the showboating Skink ball carrier. Her efforts are in vain, though, and the lizard ducks around her to score.
As the final seconds tick by the Interlopers try a desperate last run, but it is not to be. As the final whistle is blown the ball is once more travelling towards the away touchline after being taken by a Skink, and the surviving Wood Elves look relieved to be leaving the pitch on their feet.
Result: Zilla Coldbloods 2 - 1 Intemperate Interlopers
As the Zilla Coldbloods travel to play the Intemperate Interlopers for the second set of matches in their pre season unfriendlies, they are treated scorching temperatures. While this is nice to lounge in, though, it's not great for playing Blood Bowl.
First half
Riled by the heat, the thronging Coldblood fans abduct the referee while the Interlopers kick off. The home front line is easily pushed back by the larger Saurus, but this proves to be an impetuous mistake by the lizardmen. The Elven fallback proves to be a feint for manoeuvring space, as a lightning bolt erupts from the crowd to open a hole in the Coldblood front line. As the unlucky wizard is set upon by thousands of Coldblood fans, the Interlopers' star catcher easily slides through the gap. The rear guard Skinks, still considering how best to catch the ball, can only grasp as the nible Elf catcher makes the decision for them, sweeping up the ball as she dodges past on her way to a touchdown.
The effort of the previous down proves too much for both teams in the sweltering sun, and each returns to the field a player down. As the Interlopers kick again the Coldbloods set up a deeper defence. Overcautious and cranky in the heat, the Saurens spend the rest of the half beating up the Elven front line while the Skinks play their favourite game of chasing the ball around behind them. Safe in the lead, the Wood Elves simply try to minimise the damage they recieve until the whistle.
Second Half
The second half gets off to a bad start for the Coldbloods, as one Skink is injured by a Wardancer before he manages to even get near the ball. The lizardmen turn the tables though, hurting the other Wardancer and breaking a catcher's leg. As the Coldbloods focus on bringing pain to the Interlopers for getting ahead, they allow the Elves to skillfully shoot the ball across the width of the pitch to be run down the relatively quiet left field for another touchdown.
The Interlopers kick to a sorry looking Coldbloods team, almost catching their own ball as their racy star catcher snatches it from the sideline before the Skinks have even worked out where it landed. The fans save the day again though as the elf tears up the edge of the pitch, and a nonchalantly protruding leg brings her crashing down and seeing stars of her own. The Coldbloods' own hero, Sssplit, wastes no time in retracing the Elf's steps and taking the ball back over the centre line. Shielded by a larger Saurus clearing the way, the top Skink sails through the Elven lines to score.
The field looks sparse now with both sides almost down to half a team. Skinks dash around the patchy Elven line to grab the nearby ball, but a stray lineman manages to intercept. Bizarrely, the pair have a clash of skulls and both crash to the ground unconscious with the ball spinning between them. The normally relatively subdued Elven crowd are baying for the final whistle as one of the Wardancers reaches for the ball, but with the ref counding down injury time it is snatched from under his nose as a Skink rockets past, diving over the line for a last second equaliser.
Result - Intemperate Interlopers 2 - 2 Zilla Coldbloods
Match Report - Zilla Coldbloods Vs Intemperate Interlopers
First Half
Wise to the Elven tactics after the last game, the Coldbloods' Saurus frontliners concentrate on battering one of the Interlopers' Wardancers as the kicked ball drops close behind them. Always better at home, the new boy Saurus, Gopper, thrills the crowd by opening the game with a fatal forearm smash to an Interloper Lineman's throat right in front of them. One of the Skinks hurdles the twiching corpse as he carries the ball down the sideline, but the Elves rally and the little lizard is KOd when he finds a wall of Interlopers blocking his path. Sore after the loss of his teammate, the Lineman who retrieves the ball takes a kick at the prone Skink's head on the way past, knocking the runner out but getting sent off for his efforts. The game only gets dirtier, and as the Coldbloods quickly run the ball forwards a loitering Sink takes the opportunity to KO the Interlopers' star catcher who has been knocked over in the squabble. The ball carrying Skink presses on, somehow taking out the Elven last man on the way to a touchdown.
A lucky kick sees the Coldbloods grabbing the ball after their kick lands it right in front of their Skink wingers, but the Elven quarterback snatches it back into Interloper possession. Glancing at the clock, the thrower is quickly buried under a pile of reptiles, and the whistle blows for the end of the half as the ball pops out of the pile and lands in the hands of a startled Saurus.
Second Half
The Coldbloods kick into right field, the ball being followed on the ground by a speeding Skink. The hurtling lizard juggles the ball briefly, only securing it after he has bounced if off an Elven catcher. Possession is brief though, as the catcher knocks the Skink over, retrieves the ball, and pauses to lay the boot in. Sprinting down the sideline, the Interloper is crowded by several Lizardmen, but they can do nothing to stop him as he skillfully slips through the throng to score.
Severely depleted now from taking a mauling on the scrimmage line, the Interlopers' remaining five players huddle together on the line. In their efforts to try to draw opposing players away with the ball, though, they kick the ball off the end of the pitch. The outnumbered Wood Elves are quickly boxed in by Saurus, only their star catcher managing to break out to try to intercept the showboating Skink ball carrier. Her efforts are in vain, though, and the lizard ducks around her to score.
As the final seconds tick by the Interlopers try a desperate last run, but it is not to be. As the final whistle is blown the ball is once more travelling towards the away touchline after being taken by a Skink, and the surviving Wood Elves look relieved to be leaving the pitch on their feet.
Result: Zilla Coldbloods 2 - 1 Intemperate Interlopers
I think I'm going to save the match reports now for the tournament. Assuming everyone who isn't tldr isn't bored of them already. Teams so far:
Zilla Coldbloods - Undefeated Lizardman running team led by Coach Dogpants.
Intemperate Interlopers - Coach Amblin's Wood Elves have been proving tricky opponents, but mounting casualties and some dodgy book-keeping have started to cause them problems from within.
Spuckenoder Swallows - After a troubled start, Coach Anham's Dwarven team has become notorious for being the dirtiest players in the Five Punk Series.
Swamp-Rats - The elusive Skaven team, led by Coach Mr.Joose, have seen little activity so far in the pre-seasons. With only one game under their belts (do rats wear belts?), they remain an unknown quantity.
Zilla Coldbloods - Undefeated Lizardman running team led by Coach Dogpants.
Intemperate Interlopers - Coach Amblin's Wood Elves have been proving tricky opponents, but mounting casualties and some dodgy book-keeping have started to cause them problems from within.
Spuckenoder Swallows - After a troubled start, Coach Anham's Dwarven team has become notorious for being the dirtiest players in the Five Punk Series.
Swamp-Rats - The elusive Skaven team, led by Coach Mr.Joose, have seen little activity so far in the pre-seasons. With only one game under their belts (do rats wear belts?), they remain an unknown quantity.
-
Anhamgrimmar
- Ninja Pirate
- Posts: 1517
- Joined: July 17th, 2005, 13:29
- Location: Saaaarfampton
Here's a screenshot;
As you can see it's not too pretty, but it is pretty clear and easy to use. It's also a brilliant turn based tactical game with equal measures of anguish and hilarity. The persistent team system provided by FUMBBL works flawlessly too, uploading your results and letting you spend your money and points as soon as the game finishes.
As you can see it's not too pretty, but it is pretty clear and easy to use. It's also a brilliant turn based tactical game with equal measures of anguish and hilarity. The persistent team system provided by FUMBBL works flawlessly too, uploading your results and letting you spend your money and points as soon as the game finishes.
-
Roman Totale
- Robotic Bumlord
- Posts: 8475
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 0:27
- Location: Manchester, UK
Fuck it, I've pre-ordered the proper game. Shiny 3D graphics, a game browser, easy league setups, and a single player mode, on top of exactly the same game we're already playing. JBBowl and FUMBBL and impressive, but I'm not sure the 5punky ethos fits with theirs.
I also bought both Ace Ventura films after laughing my arse off at the first last night.
I also bought both Ace Ventura films after laughing my arse off at the first last night.
-
Roman Totale
- Robotic Bumlord
- Posts: 8475
- Joined: October 24th, 2004, 0:27
- Location: Manchester, UK
-
Anhamgrimmar
- Ninja Pirate
- Posts: 1517
- Joined: July 17th, 2005, 13:29
- Location: Saaaarfampton