FJ's Writing Class

[FatherJack]

I've been writing. Indeed, I've been attending a writing course for fiction. I've mentioned this elsewhere.

Not sure where I'm going with this thread in particular, but with my writing I have an eye on writing stories which might be one day incorporated into a game.

This isn't to define "proper" writing on the forum - perish the thought, infact may that thought die horrifically in an especially virulent fire.

But with writing in general, there are rules and if one wants to be published, they must generally be obeyed, certainly if you're a first-time writer.

So, here's a thing I've been working on for "correct" punctuation, particularly in the rather tricky area of dialogue, which I use for reference once I've written something. I'm not sure it's 100% right and find examples both proving and disproving them in published works, but unless you're the next Stephen King, deviating much from established norms won't help your cause.

It's difficult to show on a forum, but all new paragraphs (which all of these are) should be indented by about four characters. We simulate paragraphs on forums and in emails by adding line breaks, but if you look in a book you'll see line breaks are only used between section breaks with indents used to show new paragraphs and new speakers.

Anything you think I have got wrong, or examples you can think of I've missed, please say - this is kind of a work in progress.


Dialogue

“Speech,” he said. (note the lowercase 'he')

“Speech!” he exclaimed. (still lowercase 'he')

“Speech?” he asked.

“Speech.” he said. (it's not technically correct to use a full stop, but gives a sense of finality to the speaker's statement)

“Speech!” he exclaimed. “Another sentence of speech.” (it must be a new sentence because the exclamation mark ends the first one, so begins with a capital, full stop after the identification of who is speaking)

“Speech?” he asked. “Another sentence of speech.”

“Speech,” he said. “Another sentence of speech.” (a tricky one, the first sentence doesn't end until after 'said', so the full stop goes there)

“Speech,” he said, “same sentence of speech carries on.” (a comma and no capital as the speech is continued)

“Speech,” he asked, “same sentence of speech carries on?” (while correct, is a bit confusing - best to put the whole question together)

“Speech.” He did. “Another sentence of speech.” (note the uppercase 'He' - it's a character action rather than speech identifier, but it doubles as one. Other characters should not act in the same paragraph)

He did. “Speech.” (confusing, not considered good style, but can be useful if you want to end a series of character actions with a punchy line of dialogue)


Thoughts

“Speech,” he said, thinking something. (good)

“Speech,” he said. He thought something. (good)

“Speech,” he said. I think something. (bad, present tense and first-person - most writing is done in past-tense, third-person narrative)


The thoughts thing is super-tricky and I might elaborate on it further later on. It's best to grab a book and see how real authors do it, though of course there are always exceptions to the rules - in Carrie Stephen King wrote a lot of Carrie's thoughts in italics with no spaces to emphasize how fucked up she was.

badgirldirtypillowsinyourbed

[Dr. kitteny berk]

Interesting that, I'll never use it, but nice stuff to know.

[friznit]

The trick to getting direct speech correct is remembering that it's still a part of the regular sentence. A technique I often use is to consider it in its indirect form first:

Bob said that he was going to the shops.

Then reform it into direct speech

"I'm going to the shops," said Bob.

Grammatical nuances ultimately depend on your individual style. Douglas Adams used to use paragraphs, section breaks and hyphenation for comic effect:

Chapter 1

Suddenly, nothing happened.

Chapter 2

Then the universe exploded and the cosmos was born.
"Oh shit, " said God. "Wrong button."

The important thing is to be consistent. Develop a style but then stick to it. Don't be afraid to borrow from your favourite author. I used to mimic Douglas Adams. These days I mimic Stephen Hawking. Consider carefully your use of language and most especially the order in which you place your words. Often it pays to bend the rules if it reads better in contemporary English. For example:

Consider your use of language carefully and especially the order you place your words in.

It may sound counter intuitive, but a good story takes planning!

"It was the person to whom your current interlocutor habitually refers to by means of the perpendicular pronoun. It was," he sighed, "I, Minister."